Lyrics of My Love Stories

Foreword;

To me, every song reminds me a tale. Each containing lyrics, telling the story; complete with melody and rhythm that flow within the story. Every beat counts to make it perfect.

And here I am writing those unwritten fairy-tales; depending on what song I am listening.

This is a collection of one-shots.

. . .

I like to work on my own pace, each story may take weeks/months to complete. But I'm hoping each song won't dissapoint you. I believe in quality than quantity on any ground.

No, I don't take requests. I have already chosen my songs and characters; which consist of mostly K-POP stars.

. . .

Credits to Han of Vanilla Sky for the gorgeous poster and background. I can't express how much I love it. Thank you once again. Request for her @ vs-vanilla-sky.blogspot.com

Chapter One;

Doushite kimi wa suki ni natte shimattandarou?
Forewords

The day was white…

Everyone was smiling…

Music filled the atmosphere…

… You walked down the aisle…

… Pure white and innocent as ever…

Walking toward the man at the end of the aisle…

… Unfortunately he wasn’t me…

Your smile always makes me happy…

Then …

… Why am I crying …?

An original story line under Park RyeoNa

Casting Kim JunSu of Dong Bang Shin Ki and Jang RiIn

. . .

Song: Doushite Kimi Wa Suki Ni Natte Shimattandarou?
Artist: Dong Bang Shin Ki
Characters: Kim JunSu and Jang RiIn

Doushite Kimi Wa Suki Ni Natte Shimattandarou? means Why Did I End Up Falling For You?

Kim JunSu’s perspective

“Come on JunSu, we’re going to be late.” YooChun pulled me up and dragged me out of the house. I followed him lifelessly as I heard the car engine starting. The pain in my heart was too much to bear. I think I have gone numb. I was holding back my tears as YooChun pulled me towards the rest of the Dong Bang members.

“YooChun ah,” I managed to say. My voice sounded flat and unemotional, even to me. “I don’t feel so good, I don’t want to go.” YooChun glared at me for saying those words. Today was a very special day for our little sister. It was her wedding anniversary.

“RiIn will kill me if you are not going.” YooChun tried to persuade me. Then I heard a honk. I saw an inpatient YunHo at the driver’s seat, glaring at us. YooChun immediately pulled me toward the car and threw me in, literally.

“What took you two so long?” ChangMin asked as he looked at both YooChun and I. JaeJoong sat in front with YunHo. The two of them were talking about something but the engine drowned their voices. YunHo once again made the engine snarled quietly before the car started moving. It would take us about an hour to arrive at her house.

“This man right here,” YooChun pointed at me “Doesn’t want to attend RiIn’s anniversary party.” He let out a sigh of annoyance. I could not blame him. It was true. I do not want to attend. RiIn was our ‘little sister’ during college. The six of us were very closed, like a family. Only I knew her when we were just babies. She was my childhood friend. We did almost everything together. She is funny, cute, talented, brave, smart and my ideal girl. Yes, I care for her, more than just a friend, more than a little sister. It really pained me when I saw her walking down the aisle in white. I remembered it all too clearly on the eve of her wedding day, the most agonizing time of my life.

Flash Back

She called me that night to gather at our secret meeting place. It was just a bridge connecting our two houses. We used to play here when we were children. The other boys do not know this place. It was our secret place, just for the two of us. We promised if there was something we needed to tell each other, we would confessed it on this bridge. The soft crackle of the slow moving river was soothing to hear, the moon was shining brightly that evening accompany by the glittering stars. I saw her walking toward the bridge, looking absolutely elegant in her pale pink dress. The moonlight made her skin glow, her face was as beautiful as ever. My heart seemed to ache watching her. She was going to marry someone else tomorrow. Just as long as she is happy, I’ll be happy for her. I tried to smile as she stood beside me, her usual cheerful face looked serious. I dropped my smile immediately. It must be something serious she wanted to talk to me. We stood there in silent for what seem like eternity until I spoke.

“Why did you call me here?” I questioned her. Her eyes never left the flowing river beneath us. Her expression seemed to tell me that she was deep in thoughts. She looked like she was searching for the suitable words to tell me. Then she closed her eyes for one moment and took a deep breath before exhaling slowly.

“You know what day tomorrow is?” she spoke in a soft voice, almost as if she was whispering, I could barely hear her with the wind rustling through the grass. Her eyes were still close. I watched her pretty face glow as I answered her.

“Your wedding day with HanKyung. How could I forget?” I brushed my fingers through her wavy long hair. My voice was low, as if I was being hurt. Her eyes suddenly open and her gaze met mine. My hand stayed on her smooth cheek. We stared at each other and none of us uttered a word. I do not know how many minutes as passed but I wished time would stop so I never have to let her go. I do not want to see her with another man. I want her to be beside me, till the end of time.

“JunSu…” Her soft sweet voice called me. Her eyes were trying to say something, something important. Her small arms embraced me and she pulled me to a hug. I responded to her hug. A few minutes later, I heard her sobbing and I felt something wet on my chest where she had buried her head. Was she crying? Must be tears of joy for her wedding tomorrow. HanKyung was perfect for her. He would always love her. Though not like how I always love RiIn. I tried comforting her by humming her favorite song, which the Dong Bang boys and I wrote for her. “JunSu, are you happy for me?” I heard her said. My heart aches more than ever. Should I lie to her? Like I have lied to her ever since she announced her wedding? If it made her happy then I will but before I could say another word I heard her whispered the three simple words.

“I know, I know.” I felt my tears forming in my eyes. She must have meant she loved me only as a big brother, not more than that. This time, I could not help but say the truth to her. “RiIn, I love you too.”

She abruptly pushed me away after I admitted to her. Her pretty face was confused. Her tears kept on falling. Her expression showed mixed emotions. “If you loved me then why didn’t you stop HanKyung? Why didn’t you fight back? Why did you agree to sing at my wedding? Why are you just standing here doing nothing?” her voice cracked when she shouted her last sentences. She buried her face in her hands as she began to weep harder. I embraced her as she cried on my chest again. I patted her head as I was trying to hold back my own tears. “I love you. I really do. I love you.” She chanted between sobbed.

“Sorry, I’m truly sorry.” I cried out. Now there was nothing I could do to stop her wedding, absolutely nothing at all.

End of Flash Back

“JunSu, JunSu.” YooChun shook me back to reality. I looked at him with a blank face after I looked at my surroundings. We finally arrived at RiIn’s house. It looked like we arrived too early or too late for the party. Her house looked deserted except for a few cars. I scanned the house through the car’s window for any sign of her. My hands hesitated to open the passenger’s door. Yet I managed to get out and stood on the concrete path of her house. This was where I last saw her, after her wedding ended successfully. Though my heart began to ach again. This is also where I betrayed her. Her house was white with ribbons and roses that day. The atmosphere was filled with music and laughter for the married couple.

Flash Back

“Congratulation.” I wished her luck. We were all alone in her room before the wedding started. She was in her white laced wedding dress looking absolutely stunning, like an angel. She had her black hair down to her waist and it was curled to give a matured look. Her shining hair was also covered with white sparkles, making her the Queen of the day. The wedding dress showed her feminine side because it was like a short dress instead of the usual big puffy gown. I can tell it was made of silk by the way it swayed gracefully at her ever movement. Her lace-covered shoulders were pale like the roses she was carrying. The heels have ribbons that climbed up her smooth legs like a ballerina’s. She only wore light makeup since she is not use to it but she was still an enchanting beauty. Her eyes were glaring at me as I said those words.

“You’re not trying to stop me?” her voice sounded pierced, her expression was scary. She stood up and faced me, her hands turned into fists by her side, almost crushing her white bouquet. Her face gradually showed her true emotions. She was going to cry again however she bit her bottom lip to suppress it. “Why? You love me right?”

I walked toward her and embraced her for the last time. “I do love you. More than words can expressed.” I tried not to hug her too tightly as I did last night because I do not want to ruin her wedding dress. It looked so beautiful on her.

“Then stop me, stop me from doing all of this!” she cried out. I could tell her tears were forming by the soft cracks of her voice. I gently let her go and admired her for a few seconds. Her eyes have gone slightly pink, as it turned glossy. I shook my head in disapproval and cupped her small face with my hands, carefully not to ruin her makeup. “Please.” She whispered, almost breaking.

My gaze was locked to hers as we stared for minutes. Her glossy eyes were mesmerizing along with her long curl eyelashes. I slowly leaned closer as I whispered the three words again and my lips captured hers. I bit her upper lip first, letting my lower lip between hers. I felt her hands reached my head and clutched my hair, pulling me into her. She responded to me then and it made my heart soared high. Her lips were soft against mine as I embraced her tighter. I’m happy now, more than I ever had in my entire life. I was really blissful with her still in my arms, within my reach. I wish time would stay still. Truthfully I do not want to let her go. My heart was destined to be hers, eternally.

“Is the bride ready?” a female voice knocked the door, which made us broke our kiss. We glanced at the door before gazing at each other’s expressions. Her eyes were telling me not to let her go. Her smudged shiny lips were trembling, wanting to voice out. The door continued to knock as my hands were shaking around her. I have two choices now. All I ever wanted was to see her smile for the rest of my life. She has chosen her path to marry HanKyung and only I could change her course. Her eyes were begging to me, calling out to me do to choose the right path for the future, our future. I closed my eyes and little by little…

I finally let her go.

She softly called out my name as I did so. It was almost like a whisper of shock. The first image I saw was her eyes piercing at me. Like daggers threatening to kill me. Inside I could already feel my own soul dying. For now I could only smile and stepped away.

“Yes the bride is ready.” I said loud and clear yet it almost sounded like I was forced to say it. RiIn continued to stare in disbelieve at me as the door opened. YeonHee stepped in and rushed to her side. She told RiIn that the wedding was starting and the bride was needed downstairs immediately. However she stayed still as she continued to stare at me. I feel so guilty watching her. I know I’ve betrayed her. I just want her to be happy with the man she loves. HanKyung would always love her and take good care of her. I’ve made my decision.

End of flash back

“Look there’s the happy couple! Nuna!” ChangMin happily shouted at the married couple’s direction. The rest waved at them while I could only stare. I could feel my spirit dying once again. All of a sudden I felt something wet dripping down on my cheeks. I did not realize my tears were forming. She looked so happy…

Copyright © Park RyeoNa 2009

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Chapter Two;

Love Is. . .
Song: Love Is…
Artist: Dong Bang Shin Ki
Characters: Park YooChun and Kwon BoA

Kwon BoA’s perspective

“No, no I can’t lose it!” I searched harder in my school bag but it was another failure attempt. My phone was still missing. My parents are going to punish me. This is the seventh time I lost my cell phone. I checked under my desk for the fifth time however there was no sign of my blue phone anywhere. Where is that thing? It was four in the afternoon when I realized it was lost. School was over at that time. Silent devoured the room as I stopped to think. The classroom was deserted except for my best friend, YeonHee and me. She was sitting on her chair amused seeing me panicked. She may be evil but truly she cares about me. I continued to destroy my school bag as I took every single object out.

“BoA, enough before your bag is torn apart,” YeonHee shook her head. She was smirking too. “I’ll call your phone and you try to find the ring tone.” She took out her cell phone and started dialing. We waited in silent. “It’s ringing, where was the last time you had it?” I thought about her question and I remembered I was in computer room earlier.

My legs immediately rushed out to the abandoned hallway. In the desolated computer room, I saw the lights were still on and some computers were not shut down. Strange, was someone still here? I scanned the room and confirmed that not a soul was here except for me. This is wasting electricity. I walked to one of the still running computer and shut it down. I did the same to the others. As I was walking to the last working computer, I heard my cheerful ring tone. My mobile phone was here. I turned around to find the source and it was coming from the cabinet. The cabinet was full of CDs and records. My blue phone was between a CD and a book, perfectly arranged. Funny, I don’t remembered going near the cabinet. Anyway I grabbed my still ringing phone and answered it.

“Thanks YeonHee, I’ve found it~.” I cheerfully said just to annoy her. I was waiting to hear her voice of irritation as a replied but the voice that responded to me was completely different. It was a male’s voice, deep and full of amusement.

“Glad you found it. I was worried you never going to come.” At first I was confused. Questions started to fill my head within seconds. Continued with shock, my hands were shaking. “Next time try not to lost it again. Bye BoA.” The line went dead after that. He knows my name too? I checked my phone if he did anything to it. Fortunately, all of my contacts and messages are still in it. He did not do anything to it. When I saw it was almost five, my legs sprinted again. My parents are going to kill me if I do not get home. The hallway that used to be busy with students was vacant and dimmed. I could only hear the sound of my own footsteps walking alone, gradually slowing. It was creepy as the sun settled down bit by bit. I tried to control my breathing as I walked. Out of the blue, my phone rang. Without thinking, I answered it. I need to hear a voice. I do not want to feel unaccompanied.

“Do you have a phobia about being alone?” the deep voice spoke. My feet froze the moment I heard it. I scanned the deserted hallway and saw no one. “It’s no use in trying to find me.”

“Okay, who are you and what do you want from me?” I was frustrated when I asked that. Reason because he can read me like a book! He just knew me and he knows what I’m thinking while I only could guess who he is. He just laughed as an answer. His laugh was sweet with his unusual deep voice. His voice was uniquely deep and compelling.

“I just want to be friends, that’s all. What’s the harm in that?” I was getting sick hearing his voice full of optimism. “I like you BoA.” I heard him muttered, though it was low and almost whispering that I could barely hear it. His statement made my cheeks hot. There was a short pause before he spoke yet again. “You better go home before your parents get worry.” the moment he mentioned my parents, I dashed to my classroom. While I was packing my books, the stalker was mumbling about how forgetful I am sometimes. Why does he know so much about me? It was getting on my nerves.

“Yah, at least give me a nickname to call you. If you refuse, I’ll call you stalker.” in fact I already call him a stalker. The other line was quiet for some time before I heard some movements, maybe he was thinking. As I set my last book in, I found a note from YeonHee. It was on my desk beneath my entire books. She was tired of waiting for me so she went home ahead. I should have called her or something, I felt bad. When I was about to hang up my phone, the stalker voiced out.

“How about Micky? As in the mouse only without an e.” I was on my way out from the classroom when I started to laugh. “What’s so funny?” I told him nothing. Does he know I like Mickey Mouse? After that, I ended up talking to him all the way back home. I found out that he likes to joke and he too, likes Mickey Mouse. Though he still refuses to tell me who he really was.

Ever since that incident, Micky started to call me everyday. At first I was annoyed, however I got used to it and he was a great listener. YeonHee and I always bicker plus I feel somewhat relief whenever I told my story to Micky. He would listen quietly as I babble on and on. After each story I told him, he would give me advice or joke about it. His jokes managed to make me laugh every time. His laugh also made my heart smile; it was always pure and childlike. It made me believe he would never lie to me. I also learned that he played the piano; I once heard him play over the phone. He sang me a song, which I never heard before. He told me he likes to write songs. The funny thing is he is like my ideal man. Someone who would talk or listen to me, make me laugh, sing me a song and give me happiness. I just needed to hear his deep voice and already my lips formed a smile.

“Micky, who are you?” I was gazing at the clouds in my bedroom. It has been approximately three months since Micky found my phone. I’ve grown attached to him and nowadays I’m the one who calls him. I heard some soft muffles in the background. It was mixed voices of males and also an engine purred quietly. Where was he?

“I’m Micky and you’re BoA.” He simply answered. I really want to strangle him right now. He still has not told me who he really is. In the background again the muffles went softer and softer until it was silence. There was still an engine sound though. After a few seconds I heard a bang sound. I asked him about that. “It was the door.” His tone was soft and lifeless. It made me worried. He would never talk to me in that tone. His voice was usually cheerful and full of life.

“Micky, are you okay?” he did not answered me. I called out him name but there was no replied. I shouted his name but it was still responded with silent. I listened intently on the background. I heard a faint breathing and the engine purring quietly. I was getting anxious. Why isn’t he answering me? I called him name over and over again. When there was still answer, I felt my tears forming and my heart accelerating. Micky, please answer me.

“Micky can’t answer you right now,” a tenor voice suddenly spoke. It shocked me. It was not the voice that I wanted to hear. Where was the voice that always comforted me? “I’m Xiah, Micky’s friend.” His voice has a hint of squeakiness in it. It was also colored with concern. It made me feel unease more then ever.

“Where’s Micky?” my voice shook as I breathe. My breathing got shorter and shorter as my mind focus on Xiah’s voice. I bit my bottom lip to suppress my sobs. My heart was still racing as I managed to stop my tears.

“Can you come to the Seoul Airport?” he didn’t answered me directly but I have a feeling he wanted to tell me something else, something important. I replied yes to his question and he ordered me to go there now. I hung up as soon as I rushed out. Seoul Airport was just a few kilometers away from my house. It’ll take me approximately fifteen minutes if I took the taxi. My mind focused on my memories of Micky when I sat in the taxi. The days when we talked to each other, how I miss his voice if he didn’t call, the jokes that made me laughed and the first song he sang to me. I placed my hand over my chest and I could feel my heart beating. Why do I feel so worried? Why do I never want to let Micky go? Why all of a sudden?

The Airport was busy as ever when I arrived. My eyes look around as soon as I stepped into the entrance hall. I’ve always had an imaginative image of Micky. I remembered one night when I asked him to describe himself. He answered he had white smooth skin, mushroom hairstyle and baby like cheeks. I tried to picture it in my head and find anyone who had those characteristics. My heart felt so uneasy as I searched.

“BoA?” my eyes stopped scanning and my body froze when I heard that deep voice. It was the voice that made my day so much happiness. I was afraid somehow and I was also tensed. My whole body was shaking as I slowly turned to see my mysterious friend. My heart pounded faster at every centimeter I moved. At first he smiled at me, his smile was like an angel’s. He had the pale smooth skin, mushroom hair and baby like cheeks. He was my Micky. “BoA, what are you doing here?”

I couldn’t answer him. I couldn’t say a word. My vision was getting blurry as my tears accumulated. “Micky? Are you really Micky?” my voice cracked as I took little steps towards him. My tears slowly flowed across my face. My hand reached for him, wanting to hold him. He nodded in responded and at the same time, he took my hand. His hand was bigger than mine and warmer. I held it tight as I tried to memorize him.

“Are you disappointed in seeing me?” he looked at me directly. His low voice was full of fear. I shook my head as I bit on my lips. “Then why are you crying?” his right hand caressed my face. I closed my eyes and placed my hand on top of his. This is like a classic drama. I finally met him…but in an Airport? It’s not fair. I could my tears flow on my hand. I couldn’t stop it. I couldn’t stop him.

“Are you leaving me?” I subconsciously asked. I hold his hand tighter as I gradually opened my eyes. My sight was blurry but his face was perfectly clear. He looked at me with a mixed expression before placing both of his hands to cup my face and rested his forehead on mine. He closed his eyes after doing so. I suddenly felt my cheeks blazing. I tried to control my breathing. Our faces were so close now. I could feel his warm mint breath on my lips. I could hear my own heart beating faster and harder. “Well?” I whispered. He didn’t answer me right away. The pause seemed like without end to me. I don’t mind though. This way I could treasure his existence more.

“I’m not going anywhere silly,” he teased me. I pushed him away and he laughed at my face. I wonder what was my expression because he couldn’t stop chuckling. “My friend is the one who’s leaving,” he pointed at a group of boys across the airport, all four of them were grinning at us. I felt blood rushed to my face, have they been spying on us? This is embarrassing. One was really very tall and had short black hair. The other one next to him was shorter but more feminine looking with his clear pale face. Another one has a muscular body and dark brown hair. The last person also had a muscular body but smaller and he had the hugest grin among all of them. He also had a suitcase with him. Soon the four boys walked to our direction.

“Glad you could make it BoA. I always wanted to see you before I depart,” his squeaky voice sounded like Xiah’s. He was the one holding the suitcase. “Now I can leave Micky safe in your care,” he laughed. His laughed was unique and it sounded high, almost like a dolphin’s. I could feel my cheeks burning once again as I stared at Micky. He had his head down and smiled at me. His cheeks were flushed and his smile was a shy one. I gave him a smile too as I reached for his hand.

“I love you BoA” was the last statement he said before his lips engulfed mine.

Without realizing it, I have fallen in love…

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Chapter Three;

Love After Love
I wonder, does love only happen once? No, it is not a trick question. Love is special, something that not quite can be describe in more than one word, no vocabulary exist to describe that extraordinary feeling. So, if the answer is yes, then it is not fair. I have lost my love. She wanted me to find another. In my heart, there is only her. As she said her last words,

‘Love can come and go, JaeJoong.’

An original story line by Park RyeoNa.

Featuring JaeJoong Kim of Dong Bang Shin Ki, YuRi Kwon and YoonA Im of Girls' Generation.

. . .

Song: Love After Love
Artist: Dong Bang Shin Ki
Characters: Kim JaeJoong and Im YoonA

Kim JaeJoong’s perspective

“That’s pretty, JaeJoong!” YoonA pointed at a shop’s window, displaying various types of dolls. Her voice was light, lingering near my ear among the warm summer air. I smiled as I noticed her innocent face light up the instance she saw something she likes, just like that person would. It was so obvious. Her vanilla ice cream was still in her hand as she rushed to the store to have a better look. My smile widen watching her admiring the nine dolls. They looked like they are having a tea party. Each was beautiful in their own ways. Oddly. my fingers were cold due to the ice cream but somehow my heart was warm. A feeling I thought I could never experience again. My smile was still in place as I walked to stand by her side, trying to identify which doll caught her attention.

I was surprised at myself. My smile was always unreal before. A fake one to masked my true bitter feeling. As if there was no reason - in my mind - to smile truly without that someone’s existence. Now, thinking about it. It seemed so silly. That person must have felt unhappy by my behavior after she left. I licked my vanilla ice cream as I continued to watch the girl next to me. YoonA really look like her, act like her, laugh like her, even fidget like her. Just everything she does remind me of that person. I sigh quietly, not wanting to distract her, I guess that person still exist in my heart. Yet my smile never left my face. “That one is nice.” I said, trying to look which doll that YoonA was staring. But I gave up and stared at her eyes instead. Somehow her bright eyes vanished. A pair of soft brown eyes of longing, gazing a doll at the back of the display, replaced them. My lips curved upward again. And I took her hand in mine, leading her inside the shop.

“I want the doll at the back of the of your display. The one on the right, sitting down, wearing a red dress.” I smiled at YoonA, who looked at me with her natural big round shock eyes. The shopkeeper gladly walked to the exhibit for the requested doll and placed in a pink box fill with pale pink tissues to keep it safe. The whole time YoonA tried to reason with me that she does not really want the doll. I do not care though. I want to buy it for her. The way she was watching it made me want to get. Beside, the doll reminded me of that person as well, with its long jet black hair that neatly flow across its back and its tan smooth complexion. After a quick thank to the shopkeeper, YoonA and I exited the doll shop. She was pouting at the fact I bought her a doll. Saying I do not have to purchase it. But I was happy that I guessed the right doll. It was the exact type of doll that that person love. “I want you to have the doll. As a reminder of me.” I replied and I noticed her cheeks were red. Must be the heat.

Today was sunnier than normal. We better stop at somewhere. YoonA was sensitive to heat; oddly, just like that person. At first, I thought it was crazy how the similarities never end. As if YoonA is the re-carnation of that person. They were just so similar, the only difference were their names, their skin tone and the image they have. That person always had the air of sexiness and childish, even she was trying to act cute, she still emitting this sensual aura to everyone around her. YoonA, however, carry the opposite image; pure innocence and a hint of force. Her smile, her movement, her eyes all says innocent. Yet, they are so similar. I thought YoonA was that person. But I realized YoonA is her own person. It's hard though, thinking both were two different people.

“Want to go to that cafe?’ I asked, pointing at a sweet looking cake house. The place seem to be a lot cuter every time I visit. Every day, there's new lights, new wallpaper, just new everything, except for the furniture of course. Yes I used to come here every day with that person, but after she left, I come here maybe once a week, this place reminded me a lot of her. So I never stray too far. I saw the owner as I walked to my usual table right at the back; holding YoonA's hand. I waved at him and he somewhat looked taken back. Onew was hesitated at first but gradually he waved back. I chuckled under my breath as I sit down on the matching white chair and table. He mist have recognized YoonA.

“You know that person?” YoonA asked, as she placed the doll beside her feet while eying Onew suspiciously. I glanced at him and saw him staring at me, with the same worried look he always had every time I come here ever since that person. left. I feel bad somehow. Not only I displease that person; Onew must have been worried sick about me too. I nodded, explaining to her that I always come here. Always because this was where that person and I met. We used to celebrate here or just talk and enjoy each others' existence over a cup of coffee. That thought made me stop in my tracks, each others' existence? I almost laughed at the thought again. When YoonA asked why I laughed, I shook my head gently and asked her if she wants a cake. She cheerfully nodded, looking around the cafe for a waiter. I spotted JongHyun coming out of the kitchen's door. I called him over.

He looked as shocked as Onew did as he hand over the cafe's dark purple menu. He kept glancing at YoonA, surprised. I smiled, I was surprised as well when I saw her. My eyes somehow left the cakes' names and focused on her. For a moment I thought I saw that person right where YoonA sat. But YoonA stared back at me and smiled, for a while I thought my heart skipped a beat. I didn't know how that happened. But soon I heard JongHyun's voice explaining the types of cake on the menu to, I was somehow pulled back to reality. JongHyun didn't asked me what I wanted. I come here often enough for him to remember; a strong cup of black coffee. But I don't feel like drinking coffee. I wanted something sweeter because the angel in front of me, exist. I called over TaeMin, who just finished taking orders from another table.

“Sorry, I want to change my usual. Tell JongHyun to bring me a cup of sweet tea with cream. Tell Key to make YoonA's cake extra special. And. . . I want MinHo to make the tea,” I smiled, hoping he won't question my request. It's odd to ask MinHo to make the drinks because he's the baker of the cake shop and Key's the main chef. TaeMin beamed back brightly. His eyes twinkle in a secret way, as if he knew exactly what I'm talking about. Asking Key to make the cake extra special was a code for; 'we're celebrating today,' because the day that person and I wanted to celebrate, MinHo was sick, Key had to bake it for us. So we only celebrate for important things to make it really special.

And asking MinHo to make the drinks was another code for; I'm really happy,” because JongHyun who was usually in charge of making drinks was out; it was his and Onew's turn to run errands; Key already had a lot of orders, he couldn't handle it; TaeMin was hopeless in the kitchen; so MinHo had to make it. That day our 100th day together, I never felt happier than that day. TaeMin was joyful. Unlike the others. I guessed at least one person was glad I'm back. Back. . . saying the word itself sounded weird on my tongue, as if it was impossible.

“You come here so often that you know all of the staffs,” a voice stated. I knew it well enough that it was amused. The tone was definitely teasing. I turned to face YoonA. She was smiling from ear to ear; she found a chance to tease me. I emphasized that I really do come here every day, but not as frequent when that person left . . . me months ago. Months ago, I thought I was as dead as her. I did not do anything and stayed in bed, crying. I did not have a life, I thought, without her beside me. But now, I have this person. YoonA could make me a live again and actually be happy. “JaeJoong?” I felt her hand holding mine, she has this worried expression when I looked up. She must has noticed my bitter face. I smiled, trying to calm her down.

“I just remembered someone,” I flashed a smile easily but YoonA won't let it easily. Typical, just like that person. I should have known. I chuckled under my breath. “I remembered someone really special here,” I took her hand and hold them tight, I don't want her to disappeared like that person, “She was Kwon YuRi,” I smiled lightly, trying to ignore the bitter taste of saying her name. Even after months, I still couldn't say her name properly. As if I was mad at her. Well. . . . I really was mad at her; I was so angry that I tried to ignore her existence. I think this the first time. . . I finally acknowledge her. . . disappearance. I saw YoonA's expression; worried yet curious at the same time. Just like YuRi. “She's really special to me,” I keep explaining, hoping she would understand why. “Right here, on this exact place was the first time I saw her,”

She was reading a book, alone when I came to the cafe. She just stood out among the crowd that filled the cafe; her hair helped because it looked silky and natural but it was her skin that caught my eyes as soon as my sweep the whole room. Most Koreans are pale but her skin was unique, almost a foreigner. And I had this feeling in my tummy that made me walked up right at her. But I don't think she'll treat it as courage; you see, the cafe was really crowed, I had no choice but to asked her if I could sit right in front of her. Her eyes were mesmerizing, dark molten chocolate mixed with honey, she smiled sweetly and nodded.

“Every day since that day, I visited the cafe without fail, hoping to see or even have a quick glance at her,” I smoothly spoke, holding my white cup firmly with my hand. Look at me YuRi, sharing your stories with another girl. “And finally, on the 100th day, she finally noticed me,” I smiled, remember the day so vividly. I came into the cafe and sat at her usual table, on purpose. The cafe was empty. She came with another new book under her arm and her face brighten as soon as her eyes landed on me.

She finally noticed me, it was the day MinHo made my sweet tea.

We began talking, sometimes we talk about the weather, the world's current situation, our opinions on things. Soon we talked about her books, slowly about her and eventually about me. I noted, after a few weeks, she stopped bringing her books and just talked to me. “It may seem silly but I never felt more happy in my life than talking to her,” I still could hear her voice in my head, her tenor alto voice, her laughter, her tremble voices, the way her silky hair always slipped from her ears, the way her eyes always look at the sky, the way the corners of her mouth always curl up every time I talk about myself, everything.

But things began to change when she stopped coming to the cafe. I waited for hours, days and even weeks but she never came. I tried to remember if I did something wrong, but it was in vain. I would have visit her apartment but she never told me. “I waited until she came. On June 19th, she did,” the words started to taste bitter. I saw her running to the cafe through the glass window. But I knew something was wrong; her eyes no longer had their sparkle, they were tired, I could see the purple bruise under them. Her face was thinner than the last time I saw her. Even her skin seems lighter. She looked. . . so sick. Yet it was her expression that I could recall clearly, they were a mixture of panic, sadness and worried. I wonder what happened but she collapsed before she could even step inside the cafe.

“I didn't know what was wrong with her. She didn't told me anything. She even got other doctors not to tell me.” But when I finally had the permission to enter her room, I didn't have the strength to ask her. She looked so weak but her smile was still bright as soon as she saw me. Just everything didn't matter because of her smile, as if the only existence in the world was only in that room. We talked endlessly, as if trying to make up the times we lost. And I remember her last word, before some huge gangster guys in black suits dragged me out of her room. “Love can come and go, JaeJoong.”

I heard YoonA's chair slide noisily against the cafe's pale wood floor, my mind was dragged back to reality, I saw her white heels walking to me. I could feel her warmth as she hugged me, I could smell her sweet shampoo as I buried myself against her silk hair, “don't force yourself,” she whisper softly to me, as if I would break, as if I was the most fragile thing in the world. It was this moment that I finally realized YuRi's disappearance and YoonA's arrival to my life. They were both different people. Her voice was different from YuRi's; they were soprano alto. “JaeJoong,” she released me, I could see her face clearly. YoonA's expression, not YuRi's. Her eyes were glistering; she was crying. “You're so strong, I don't think I have the courage if I was in your place,” she looked down, her silky hair rushed downwards, hiding YoonA from me. I lifted her face with my trembling hands. YoonA's face, not YuRi. Her lips were quivering as she spoke: “How could you remember all of those moments?”

I hugged her back, trying to carefully choose my words. I don't want to lose her. “If I erase everything about her, I won’t have anything to remember her by. She was really special to me,” I think it's time now. I gently pushed YoonA away so I could see her clearly. How amazing it was that; I finally see her as YoonA, not YuRi. “YoonA-ah,” her expression was puzzled, but anticipating. Perhaps love will continued from where she left it.

“Im YoonA, are you ready to take that responsibility to protect my heart and carry on that special love?”

“Yes. . . “

Chapter Four;